I've just been trying the Mini-Trelm Green-Key 800 - Virtual Synthesiser on your interweb thing - It's smashing! So I've spread a good dollop of jam over it to see if it still sounds as good - and guess what? It does! Definitely the future of music of the future! In the interest of science, I then poured a can of Tab cola into the speaker of my Stylophone to see if would sound ok and it's now ruined. It's rubbish. Hope you're reading this Rolf Harris!

Letter sent in by Dennis, Basingstoke