Nothing but filth, everywhere you look. Cars are sticking in the foot-deep trenches originally carved out as guidance tracks by their predecessors, whilst the skies continue their soggy 24-hour open-for-business marathon, further entombing the rows of ageing autos into muddy beds for the weekend. We didn’t stick around long enough to see whether any of them got out again. Hell, the former inhabitants had already fled the carfields by this time anyhow, neck-deep into the weekend at only 5pm on a Friday afternoon. They’d probably been doing handbrake turns to get as close to the booze and music in as fast a time as possible.  | | Copyright Mike Thornton |
The “Secret Garden Party” of 2005 was possibly the worst-kept secret ever held. Maybe there was a logic of some sort in the minds of the organisers, letting all the relevant details slip to some specific gossiphounds, in the knowledge that they’d inform everybody they knew who was deemed enough of an animal to attend. That’s how it felt, anyhow – a fashionable zoo full of young, gorgeous looking monsters that seemed acutely practised in the verse of the party.  | | Noisettes: copyright Mark Danson |
We didn’t have time to get through the gates before some fake security guards with fake metal detectors and fake computers and fake handlebar moustaches tried to relieve us - and the rest of the patrons, no doubt - of our party bags, for their own enjoyment. They even had fake pills and dollar bills to show us what they were looking for, but the rained-out, dripping keyboards kind of gave them away. Those fake dollar bills were also later found in the portable toilets – a strangely satisfying experience, but another story for another day. | "...a fashionable zoo full of young, gorgeous looking monsters that seemed acutely practised in the verse of the party" | | Mark Danson |
The music played constantly - Super Furry Animals and Hard-Fi amongst countless others – but despite the musicians’ frequent attempts to steal the limelight, the soundtrack was just an incidental part of the whole weekend affair. No way was the staff about to be upstaged by a bunch of travelling pop musicians.  | | Copyright Mark Danson |
In amongst the props and general stage design, seemingly based on a video mix of Alice in Wonderland and the Teletubbies, the crowd was treated to displays of hedonistic bar practises presumably more commonly known in Heaven. Or, Hell, depending on your point of view regarding bartop-dancing cocktail waitresses (and waiters), each and every one of them happy to sell you their lips for a mere 50p. Or perhaps your view on curious single-shot measures of whisky the size of your head. Or on an unusual policy of restricting alcohol and promoting the use of laughing gas, which floored at least a dozen and sent a lot more into a bizarre set of hysterics. In the name of scientific knowledge we consumed a few balloons worth, yet managed to find the experience pretty un-amusing - but who knows what anyone else had gotten hold of to go with them… For future information: regular, clockwork silent nights don’t do business at Secret Garden Parties; the days simply get dark and then get lighter again. Like they removed the sun for a few hours to give an excuse for the fire guys to show off their talents, to set the disco balls in motion and create some genuinely breathtaking sunset moments. Looking back, it all seemed almost endless.  | | Copyright Mark Danson |
After countless hours of debauchery, we came to the break-dancers who were able to coax the sun back out of hiding. And, when it was up, the last hours were scorched by the heat. The hoards of sprightly youths threw themselves into the lake, and emerged with the energy for what was set to be the final day, remained in their swimsuits & appeared unnaturally healthy - as if from the best night’s sleep of their lives (though we had witnessed otherwise). We got out early, unable to deal with the reality of seeing it all end (or, for that matter, with the hangover). So we escaped while the sun still shone - passing the fields of abandoned cars, still covered in an inch of now-cemented filth, asleep where they skidded to a halt. They’re probably still there now, waiting for their animals to return. Maybe they’ll just wait there and keep the party going, for us to go back and join them next year. If we’re deemed worthy, we look forward to it. |
matty
blah blah blah secret garden07 was one of the most amazing things I've ever done in my life! anon
The mud made the party great for 2006! .. everyone loved every minute .. you dont go then you definately loose out. The most amazing party about ! Bell
WE locked our keys in the car had no tent - made friends we hope to see there this year - and laughed all the way through....we still think the sunday was our best day of last year. sunshine and bouncing - Am off there again on Friday - can't wait! Trycey
well wat a weekend,more like a trip away from the realms of reality.great music, wacky people and wat a location.chilled but intense. loved it all the way, thoroughly enjoyed the pagoda area and the chai,it was good to see the freaks come out on saturday night, and wat a ball we had. u bet i b back next year see u all there.xxxx Bidgood
This festival is better than all the other festivals put together. After three days you know half of the other people there. It's amazing. We danced all day..Boy Kill Boy, Clor, Noisettes, Mando Diao, Hard-Fi, and the gods that are the Super Furries!! But the bands didn't play centre stage...they were just an aspect. Truly, this thing is unbeatable...When do the tix for 2006 go on sale again? James Chitty
Simply the most magical festival experience. In fact, it's a big party not a fest. Complete lunacy and too much fun. Wicked weekend, definately going next year!!! |
