There's been much talk about the UUP MLA Billy Armstrong's portable building which serves as a constituency office. But then one politician insisted to me that it also doubled up as a base for his daughter's chiropody clinic. Visions of a "one stop shop" arrangement, in which you could get all your political and podiatric needs catered for, swam in front of my eyes. But when I spoke to Billy himself he explained that his daughter's beauty business is based at the historic nineteenth century Prospect House, in Stewartstown, whereas he conducts his constituency business from the portable building sat on the lawn outside. The UUP MLA says a joint venture simply wouldn't work. "To benefit from Juli's treatments" clarified Billy " you have to be 100% relaxed, whereas a lot of the people who come to me are up to high doh".
For those keen on a Stewartstown treatment, here is Juli's website. Prospect House
How much it costs to light up Stormont each week. That's if I have done the maths right. The Assembly floodlights are turned on approximately 70 hours per week at a cost of £1.70 per hour. Those figures come courtesy of a written answer to the DUP's Jim Wells.
1868. That's how many vacancies there are across the NI Civil Service, according to a written answer from the Finance Minister Peter Robinson.
That's what Ian Paisley claimed to have when declining to answer questions about his son's resignation during his visit to Scotland. When reporters persisted to enquire about the First Minister's own future, he implied they wanted him carried out in a box.
Last month I noted Margaret Ritchie's fetching fur collar A warm minister Now I gather that when the SDLP minister ventured alone into the lobby voting in support of the Executive budget, the DUP's Jim Shannon enquired whether the fur was real. On being informed that it was imitation, the hunting enthusiast offered to bag her a real fur within days. The minister politely declined the Strangford MLA's kind offer.
Yesterday the Ulster Unionists put out their list of MLAs who employ family members. Here it is:
Billy Armstrong: Wife and daughter----both part-time.
Roy Beggs: Wife----part-time.
David Burnside: No relatives employed.
Fred Cobain: No relatives employed.
Robert Coulter: Wife and son----both part-time.
Sir Reg Empey: No relatives employed.
Tom Elliott: No relatives employed.
Leslie Cree: No relatives employed.
Sam Gardiner: No relatives employed.
Danny Kennedy: No relatives employed.
John McCallister: No relatives employed.
David McClarty: Wife----part-time.
Basil McCrea: Sister----part-time.
Alan McFarland: No relatives employed.
Michael McGimpsey: No relatives employed.
David McNarry: No relatives employed.
Ken Robinson: Wife----part-time: son----full-time.
George Savage: Wife and daughter-in-law----part-time.
Ian Paisley and Martin McGuinness kicked off their Edinburgh trip this morning with a meeting with Alex Ferguson. They found him in good form - nothing to do with the impending match against Lyon. This Alex is the Scottish Parliament's Presiding Officer and my spies tell me he's a Liverpool supporter.
I'm 
